Sunday, July 13, 2008

the unique uncle at Osians!

that irritating, white-hair, black t-shirt uncle was again present at Osians - infact he made his presence felt. how? here it is:

Bhaand Group presents The adventures of Uncle Arse! (read Uncle ours)
as, we all were waiting for the Indonesian film - Leaf on the Pillow to start, - the lead actress was present there - and a few guests were still trickling in - the time for the film to begin was 12 45pm. and suddenly from nowhere our Uncle Arse shouted "its already 12 45, when will the film begin?" - to which one of Osian's big head replied back - "just a minute" - and my eyes with that loud voice searched where it originated from? and there he was white-hair, black T-shirt clad Uncle Arse! - infact i stared at him and found that he had a Press pass with him - which essentially means "free Entry"and moofat ka khaana ad faaltu words while socializing - so the likes of Uncle Arse at Osians use such typical lines: here they are:

- "the film works on a metophorical level" (whoever speaks this is bound to be a near Cousin of Uncle Arse)

- "for me the film works at a very personal level" - complete bull shit or rather wrong use of words.

- "the use of symbolism was wonderful" - agai, bullshit spoken to make the audience feel as if they missed something...

- "the new wave of directors are very creative" - statements like these are to be banned

- "i am enjoying films that have a certain ethereal quality to them" - god knows what is this!

- "use of handheld camera is for the dynamic nature of the lives of these human beings" - oh bahut poorana ho gaya ma'am ab kuch naya boliye

basically at these fests - no one speaks their heart out - except Uncle Arse who shouted at the right time. But why is he shouting? saala free mei dekhne aur khaana khaane ko milta hai ar upar se tere jaise film buff ko film bhi dikhaa rahein hai - sab kuch mooft...

i guesss - these so called Press and Guests are te ones that are causing the troule to film festivals - the queue of Guests/Press is always more than the people who actually buy tickets - stop this business Osians - mere paisse pe Uncle Arse aur unke jaisse logon ko mat khilao and pilao - use our hard-earned 30 rs for better acuisition of prints in Siri fort 3 and 4. else Osian rocks!

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